17 September 2020

Entertainment, Entertainment aur Entertainment!

Read time: About 2 minutes 50 seconds, or an average Bllie Eyelash song

Saw a video where the top comedians of India were discussing the future of Entertainment in India. I too have a bunch of thoughts on this, so, I'll try to fit it in my daily blogs. Here we go.

People watch movies on Netflix/Amazon Prime/Hotstar
People watch movies in Multiplexes.

These are two different set of people. Everyone has their opinion. That how it is. But as we have seen during the lockdown, most people certainly had a preference.

Did you know Streaming services AND multiplixes (i mean all screens) had to face new problems during the lockdown? Try and find the fundamental difference between both the problems.

I mean, They both are problem. One is due to lack of people, while is other is due to unexpected number of people.

In fairness, Youtube is not the go-to option for watching movies. So the comparision between Youtube and Movie theaters is not fair. I agree. But I am showing the change people's medium of preference. So you can be sure the same thing happened with paid streaming services of the world.

Life after COVID-19 will be completely different, atleast for a lot of people in entertainment industry!. See this is what usually used to happens in bollywood

Aap Chronology Samajhiye

  1. The movie teaser is released on Youtube
  2. The movie trailer is released on Youtube
  3. Director says this is their best movie yet... on twitter
  4. The movie is released in theatres. Makes crores.
  5. The movie is out in a few months on Netflix/Prime/Hotstar

Dude why don't we cut the theatre altogether?

Let me make my case

My Case

Theatre is a fun day out. It's a whole industry. It employs lakhs of people. Maybe more. With that said, so did horse industry in 1887.

But then some lady took her kids to her parents' house on a witch-powered horse-less carriage. The whole world came in influence of this witch and lost its mind. Millions (just making up this number. it was probably high) of hard-working people lost their jobs in the horse industry.

Damn these witches...

Do you understand analogies or should I explain in more simple words?

Simple Words

The world will always evolve. Indian cinemas are not going to stop either.

People will always want entertainment.

When the cinema gave quality movies, the audience wanted more.
When the cinema figured out a formula and used in every project, the audience wanted more.

You can only fool the public for so many time. At one point either the public destroys itself, or destroys the fool-er.

Nepotism is at peak. topic for another day

When the society wanted a platform for everyone to perform, the society self-provided. "Here take this social media. Now perform! For everyone for no reason at all. Social media is audience and performer moulded together." Bo Burnham.

The Indian Cinema Formula

  1. There's this girl
  2. there's this guy
  3. at first, they don't like each other
  4. then something happens and now they like each other #LoveWins
  5. Now they want to get married. #Sunskari
  6. But they can't. There's this entity (Parents, ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend, son/daughter of someone rich and powerful) which will kill boy and girl, or itself, but won't let them marry. #Drama
  7. Insert fight scene where the here who have never been to a gym kicks ass of people 2-3 times his weight! #action
  8. The entity either dies or is like "I was so wrong to come between you two". #RedumptionArcGayaBhadMain
  9. Then they get married #loveWinsAgain
  10. The movie ends with them jumping in a freeze frame! #WhereAreMy100Crores?

  • Note: please feel free to skip one or two steps. it doesn't matter. Who care about story consistency anyways
  • Yea Yea I know I am generalising. But as a 27-year-old, can I ask why do every movie have to have a marriage scene?

  • Bhai Shadi ke liye time hai abhi
  • Coming back to the formula. I have a few problems with it.


    Where the character arc for the bad guy? Why does the bad guy have to be bad just for the sake of being bad? Why is the bad guy so adamant in their goals? I mean won't they learn a few things on the way?

    Where are the villains who have sympathy? Personally, my favourite villain is Elias from Person of Interest. Due was the mob boss who has a class. Had a purpose.

    Most of our villains are simply mad at life. And yea I Am AwArE I aM gEnErAlIsIng. I KnOw.

    The Fight Scenes. Insert Munna Bhai meme. Yea har movie main fight scene dalna zaruri hai kya? Why is the Bollywood's perspective of entertainment a fight scene which defies the basic laws of physics?

    The Ending. The perfect ending of a movie is when a couple gets married. yay. What else is left in life now? Sab kuch to karliya. Who cares about stories for married life. There's no money in that.

    The Songs. Oh God, I will get so much in trouble for saying this. Indian movies love adding songs. No issue with that. that's our culture. Let's talk about the type of songs we have:

    • Sad songs. Because your crush doesn't love you.
    • Love songs. Because your crush does love you.
    • Item songs. Needs those views. Besides how else will uncle and aunty show our parampara during shadi barat?

    Please Tweet me if you find any 4th category of songs in mainstream Bollywood.


    This blog started as my way of saying Bollywood should think beyond Theaterial release. Streaming looks like the future.

    But I ended up sharing what I don't like about an average Bollywood movie. How many people do you think I triggered this brain dump of an article?

    Was Mogambo call Mogambo as a kid as well.